mhuzzell: (Icarus)
[personal profile] mhuzzell
For the second time this year I've broken down crying in front of a cold laptop screen. Earlier tonight I got a Facebook message informing me that an old friend from school died last Friday of an overdose. I was shocked, and though it registered cognitively it didn't quite hit me emotionally. I phoned Meredith to pass the information along, then went down to the talk I'd been planning to attend. But then I came back, and in searching for a number on Facebook I found his profile. The wall was covered in messages of love and rememberance, to which I added my own. I had a strange urge to call his mobile. And then I was sobbing.

It's times like these that I really feel the ocean--the vast, deep, salty, heavy ocean--between myself and home. Grasping at tendrils of electronic information, trying to translate cold pixeled words into emotions, while another loved one slips quietly into the past tense.

Tomorrow I will go to a tutorial in which we will discuss the implausibility of mind-body dualism; the absurdity of the idea that the mind--or soul--could exist without the body.

I love you Ben. Even if there is none, I'm holding you in the Light.

Date: 2007-10-09 12:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] iamunicorngirl.livejournal.com
Katy Boulet told me at dinner. I visited facebook too, and went down to the pond and began to cry. I didn't even know him very well, but he was a sweet person. Times like this I'm terrified someone else I care about will someday be sudddenly - gone. That's one of my big fears.

It's times like these that I really feel the ocean--the vast, deep, salty, heavy ocean--between myself and home. Grasping at tendrils of electronic information, trying to translate cold pixeled words into emotions, while another loved one slips quietly into the past tense.

that's gorgeous molly, and I agree with it.

Date: 2007-10-09 09:11 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] piratemoon.livejournal.com
If I was still next door I'd give you a hug. Here's a virtual one, though it is poor recompense, I know.

I miss our tea break meetings.

Date: 2007-10-11 03:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lizzellwild.livejournal.com
that was beautiful, and almost made me cry. i wish i were there so i could give you a hug.

was this person from scattergood or AMS? i don't think i knew him, but i'll hold him in the light too.

Date: 2007-10-14 12:38 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] mhuzzell.livejournal.com
Scattergood.

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